The book that changed how I talk to my customers
(And no, it’s not about Customer Success… but it should be)
There are books you read out of curiosity, and others that embed themselves into the way you work.
The Mom Test, by Rob Fitzpatrick, is one of the latter.
It’s not a book about Customer Success, nor about SaaS, nor even about customer relationships.
But since I read it, it has changed the way I approach users, feedback… and conversations I used to think were “insights” but were actually… kindness disguised as validation.
What is The Mom Test about?
Rob Fitzpatrick was an entrepreneur. One of those who went out to talk to potential users with an idea in hand, got lots of smiles, lots of “sounds great”, but then… no one bought.
The thesis of the book is simple:
“If even your mom can lie to you to be nice, imagine what a customer who doesn’t want to seem rude can do.”
What resonated most with me as a CSM
As a Customer Success Manager, I speak every week with customers who give me their opinion about our product.
And many times, they say things like:
- “Yes, we’re using it quite a bit…”
- “No, it’s not a big issue right now”
- “The team will probably start using it more soon”
But… is that true? Or is it just a polite way of avoiding making me uncomfortable?
After reading the book, I realized that many of my questions were poorly framed. They were comfortable for me, but not useful for the customer or the product.
Three mistakes this book fixes (and how to do it better)
1. Asking for opinions instead of facts
❌ “Do you think this feature would be useful to you?”
✅ “How are you solving this today?”
Why it works: when you ask about the present, you get real data. When you ask about the future, you get assumptions.
2. Mistaking enthusiasm for validation
❌ “Do you like this new dashboard section?”
✅ “Have you used this section this week? What for exactly?”
Enthusiasm is not commitment. Usage is.
3. Avoiding uncomfortable topics to prevent discomfort
❌ “Was everything clear during onboarding?”
✅ “Was there anything that confused you or wasted your time during onboarding?”
Open and honest questions unlock problems before they turn into churn.
What does this have to do with Customer Success?
Everything.
Because if you don’t know what your customer actually needs, if you don’t understand what problem they’re trying to solve, and if you don’t learn how to spot half-truths disguised as positive feedback, then…
You’re managing relationships, but you’re not driving outcomes.
How do I apply it today in my work?
Since reading The Mom Test, I’ve incorporated into my calls:
-
Questions focused on the past and present
“When was the last time you used this feature?”
“What do you do when X doesn’t work?” -
Real commitment detectors
“Who owns this internally?”
“How much time does it take you to solve it today?” -
And most importantly: I don’t rush to justify the product. I listen. I ask. Then I act.
Do I recommend it?
Absolutely.
Even if you’re not a founder. Even if you’re not validating ideas.
If you talk to users, leads, customers, or stakeholders… this book is gold.
Thanks, Rob Fitzpatrick, for teaching us that the best answers come from the most uncomfortable questions.
Want to try it?
Next time you talk to a customer, try replacing a polite question with a direct one (but still sincere).
And if you’re interested, I’m preparing a template with questions based on The Mom Test adapted to Customer Success.
Would you like me to publish it? Let me know in the comments or send me a message!
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